I've been toying with the thought of deleting this blog, completely wiping it out into oblivion. Oldest son discouraged that idea, said Imprisoned in my Bones is who I am, and I would lose myself without these words on the internet, these two and a half years of words that speak a lifetime of pain, joy, faith and love. Maybe that's the right idea, to lose myself...to live for Him alone.
All of the poems, prayers and stories have exposed me-but have they really given the glory to the only One deserving of exposure? I read the words of famous bloggers who are hailed as heroes of faith for their uplifting words, but what happens at night when the house is quiet and all of the internet chatter is silenced? What happens when they lay in bed staring at the ceiling in the dark? Is He there holding them, loving them? Can they feel Him? Or are they waiting for the happily ever after that is supposed to come for those who believe-but living like Cinderella in the ashes, waiting for Prince Charming to make himself known?
I want to be erased of all that I am, Lord, and to be rewritten for You alone. I want to feel You now, know You right here. Sweep away the ashes and erase me, Lord, so that You alone are known.
