"I have called you by name, you are mine." Isaiah 43:1
In reading the Gospel of Matthew 1:1-17, the one where Jesus’ genealogy is traced back 14 generations name by name, I almost felt sorry for some of those poor people who were saddled with such difficult to pronounce, and (forgive me for this) ugly names. In my favorite book and movie, Anne of Green Gables, Anne comments on what lovely names her parents had (Walter and Shirley) and when she was scolded that names don’t make a difference, she defiantly responded that names make an awfully big difference. How horrible it would have been for them if they would have been given a name like Hezekiah! Well, lo and behold, there is a Hezekiah in Jesus’ family history! I’m sure that didn’t bother Jesus one bit, because he knows that what’s in a person’s heart is more important than what’s in their name. Still, I have to agree with Anne on the importance of a person’s name, after all, when you live with a name your whole life, you really come to identify yourself with it, it is a huge part of who you are, and when someone misspells or mispronounces your name, it can’t help but have a negative effect on you.
My parents originally intended to name me Lisa. A few months before I was born, my mom’s sister, Anne, died from a brain tumor. My uncle Ray, in his grief over the loss of his beloved wife, asked my parents to name me after her if I was a girl, and they lovingly agreed. I often wonder if my life would have been different as Lisa. I believe that your name changes your whole outlook on things as well as the way other people treat you. Just having that extra “e” on the end of my name makes a huge difference in my life. To quote Anne of Green Gables once again…”Spell out A-n-n and it looks simply dreadful, but Anne with an “e” looks quite distinguished!” Now, as anyone who has a name that’s spelled a bit different from the usual spelling will tell you, it becomes a bit of an irritation to see your name misspelled, and I forever wonder if I should constantly correct people who miss the "e" on the end of my name, or just let it go.
Now nicknames are another matter. When I was growing up, my family and everyone in my hometown called me Annie, which I loved. Today, I am known by Anne to everyone except my family of origin. (Although, when someone I know well and care about calls me Annie, I do like it!) But, if a stranger or someone I don’t know very well would call me Annie, I would be offended as if they had crossed a line, you know, like someone who stands too close to you and invades your personal space. It makes me wonder who that person is talking to, it can’t be me!
My daughter Mary is a beautiful and lovely eight year old girl. Everyone who knows her, loves her. When people see Mary and I together, they often confuse us, and end up calling me Mary, even people who know us well like Mary’s teachers. While I would love to be an eight year old girl again, and am quite flattered to be confused with my daughter, I often wonder how this happens and why it bothers me so much. I guess I feel that if I were really important to someone, they would take the time to know my name and remember it. On the other hand, I am often guilty of making the same type of mistake with my sons, especially when I am angry or in a hurry. It seems that I quickly forget who I am talking to and start rattling off their names unable to stop myself. For instance, I will be looking at my son Joe and say, “Tell Joe to bring the laundry down for me.” He looks at me in disbelief and says, “Mom, I am Joe.” To which I smartly reply, “Well then, do it!” And what mother of multiple children can’t confess to calling her children by the wrong names especially when angry. I’m sure we’ve all done it!
In my position as a nutritionist for the Women, Infant and Children (WIC) Program, I see lots of babies every day, and some of them have the most interesting names. I often wonder if their names will affect the way their lives will turn out, in other words, will they live up to their names. It would be interesting to meet them in twenty years and see what they might have to say about it. For instance, will the babies named Phelony and Khaos grow up to be destructive and violent, and will the babies named Jesus and Heaven grow up to be deeply spiritual?
I know that living for the past 43 years with the name of my aunt who was deeply loved by her family has inspired me to want to deeply love others as well. And living with the name of St. Anne, the mother of Mary, has inspired me to want to be a good role model for my own daughter Mary. Also, living with the name that means “grace” has caused me to be more aware of the grace of God present in my life. But, I'm still not sure if it’s truly our names that affect our lives, or if it’s something else in our environment that can impact what kind of people we turn out to be. Our names certainly are important, but they aren't the end of our story, there is so much more to us than just our names.
In fourteen generations time, when our descendants peruse the geneology list, what will make our names stand out will be how we lived our lives as children of God. That will be the real testimony to who we were. Like Jesus, the future generation will know that what’s in a person’s heart is more important than what’s in their name.
(For darling Easter at A Tribute to Our Priests and Mostly Prayers who has such a lovely and unusual name. She is sure to be remembered in 14 generations, not only for her name, but mostly for the love and kindness that is in her heart!)
